This past Sunday we celebrated Mother’s Day so today, enjoy a special reflection from Keara Ette about abundant love.
Keara Ette's Mother's Day Reflection:
Good morning and Happy Mother's day to all! Mother's Day is a kind of a mixed bag sometimes. It seems to be great for florists. Heard there was a shortage of a lot of different kinds of flowers recently. Great for greeting card makers. Um, the jury is still out on whether school teachers like it. They're sort of charged with creating lots of creative crafts.
For the kids to bring home to the mothers and grandmothers and godmothers. Uh, churches love it. We love packing the house on Mother's day. Before pandemic times we would add extra masses and pull out extra folding chairs. Um, And it is complicated. For those of us who have lost a mother or a mother figure.
Mother's day. Is heartbreaking. For those who long to be mothers. Where those who never really had a mother's love the way they deserved.
It's heartbreaking for those who have lost a child.
But Mothers do you deserve the praise that we give. And any discounts that you might find on Mother's Day or leading up to Mother's Day. But the funny thing is most mothers, I believe, would say something like what Peter said in the first reading. When they bow to him, his response was, "No, please get up."
And most mothers would say, "Please, get up. We're just human beings." Because in truth, God shows no partiality. And I think part of that is because most of us who do any mothering are deeply aware of our insufficiencies. We're deeply aware of how imperfect we are at mothering or loving.
But I think a part of this is really fascinating if we think about St. Peter, it's unlikely that Saint Peter could have said those words. The first day that he was called into Jesus's friendship and ministry. I think it took years. Years of spending time with Jesus. Years of spending time with the Holy Spirit after Jesus's resurrection.
Only after those years and that transformation in love. Could he say those words, "we're just human beings. Get up. God shows no partiality."
What I've learned from mothers and mothering is that mothering is about love in abundance. It's about this God who says, "I have loved you and so you go out and love others." Jesus tells us, "As the Father has loved me, so I love you." So it's that same direction of love poured in and love poured out.
I learned this from my own mom, uh, along with my dad, she raised three girls. Uh, I think we're decently human beings, but the jury is maybe still out on that as well. But I also watched her mother hundreds of teens and young adults. You see, she was a coach. She was a volleyball coach. It all started when the local parish, uh, put a thing in the bulletin, asking for anybody to start any sort of girl's sport.
And so she answered and said, okay, I can start a volleyball team. And that became a volleyball club and that became grade school, high school. Uh, then onto college. She coached boys and girls, young men and young women. And there were a lot of skills on the court that she taught. And she taught us to teach.
But what I really watched her pour out where are the other skills. She mothered hundreds of people. And sometimes, those kids, those teens, they got mothering from her that they couldn't get from their parents for one reason or another.
I watched my mother pour out what was poured into her.
You know, I don't know if this is your experience, but I've also learned to mother from my own kids. And I tell people this when, when somebody is about to welcome a child into their home or, um, or have a baby, they'll say, you know, you have any advice. And I usually say, I think they're going to teach you.
Your kids teach you. Um, And one of the things that we've learned, we have three boys and each of them had pretty bad reflux as infants. And that led to lots of screaming and not us not knowing what a, an infant smiling looks like for a long time. Cause they were just so uncomfortable. And our middle guy, Sam, he had it either. He had it the worst.
Or it was on top of just his insecurity. You know, I think some people just have this deep, um, this deep longing, for someone or something to provide security and reassurance. And so our Sam is an infant. If you ever tried to put him down at night, even if he was totally exhausted there was a look of terror in his eyes.
And so we walked, we walked all night. Whoever's turn it was. So many thousands of steps through the kitchen until one of us just dropped in exhaustion. And it went on for months. And my husband and I would look at each other and be like, is there a better way to do this? Those of you who are doctors or physicians or, you know, experts in any way you're probably thinking to yourself, "yes, there is a better way to do that." We didn't find it.
So we would fall asleep with a hand on him through the crib so that your arm falls asleep until he could trust, and he, until he could trust his surroundings. Was it too much? Maybe.
Remain in my love. Remain in my love, is what mothers do. And what they say with their actions and with their love. Remain in my love, if the spelling test doesn't go as planned. If the driver's test doesn't go as planned. If you make life choices that I wouldn't have made for you. And we, anyone who mothers, we pray that we can remain in that love every time we fall short. Every time we don't show up for you the way we want to. Every time, our own wounds or our own fears stop us from being kind and understanding and compassionate and patient, remain in my love.
Motherhood is a lot less concerned about efficiency than a lot of other things in the world. I think for most moms, if you ask them, you know, Are you sure that's the most efficient way to do it? We don't know what we're doing most of the time. But the instinct is, I don't know. We're just going to pour out what was poured into us.
I think the abundant love of God is what fuels mothering. And whether you're the godmother that steps in and has been the constant presence in someone's life. Or you're the foster mother. Or you have mothered your coworkers or even mothered your own parents.
That love comes from the Father through Christ, to us and back out into the world.
So on this day in our house, uh, we, we never have a holiday it's like a whole week. So there are decorations, um, you know, actually my kids, another way that they've taught me for Valentine's day, we bought this little, at a craft store, we bought this little like pretend mailbox thing, and it's just made of cardboard. And I thought, oh, that's like 12 minutes that they'll entertain themselves and decorate and hopefully not get paint on the floor.
And they did, they decorated it, but then for 12 days leading up to, um, Valentine's day, they made Valentines, like dozens. I swear there were over a hundred Valentines in that box, right guys. And every day I'd hear, I made four more for Joey. There are three more here for Gigi. There's 12 more for you, Daddy.
And we would just, my husband, and I would look at each other and be like, oh my gosh. Enough. Enough already. But there's something inside of kids. There's something inside of human beings that said,
"It's not really enough. There's never too much." That love pours out. So this week, those in your life that, you know, those of us who are mothered by people in our lives. Maybe we can reach out to them. And tell them, I see you. I see your love poured out. I see your creativity. Your resourcefulness. I see your sacrifice. I see your joy. I see your exhaustion.
And you are doing it right because you're pouring it out.
On this Mother's Day, on this Easter day, may we reside and remain in that love, that resurrected love, that was always meant to be poured out. Happy Mother's Day to all! - Keara Ette